a: a feeling or consciousness of one’s powers or of reliance on one’s circumstances
b: faith or belief that one will act in a right, proper, or effective way
“Confidence” is a powerful word.
The truth is that it can make or break critical moments in your life — from career to relationship decisions.
Those who have it can’t always tell you exactly when “it” happened — that precise moment they became more confident in life.
Others may tell you it came over a period of time.
I believe one major way to increase your confidence is by recognizing small wins, and remaining positive, as you work toward the BIG win.
And if you start to recognize those small wins, trust me, you’ll start to notice them everywhere.
Here are three examples of what I mean:
Example 1) You didn’t get the top job you were aiming for, but you were a finalist. It’s the first time your interview process went this far, and you take pride in that. You pat yourself on the back for applying, and recognize you are one step closer toward your goal. This realization stirs something up inside of you — a chain of thoughts and actions.
You start to feel it is even more possible for your dream job to happen and your determination kicks into high gear. You feel more empowered. As you start to work harder, you dive into personal development courses and land a mentor. Those actions ultimately lead you to gain more confidence in your abilities, and later, you decide to launch your own business.
Example 2) You didn’t get into the school program of your choice but another school offered you a scholarship. At first you feel a bit bummed about the rejection letter. But then you remind yourself how many others would love to receive a scholarship to the other school. Boom. Confidence goes up!
You also realize you could always transfer to your preferred school, if you continue to work hard and ace those exams. What’s more, the scholarship will help ease your financial burden (say goodbye to working those late hours at the pizza shop). This means more time to study — and focus on what’s next.
Example 3) You applied for a board member position at a prestigious local organization for the first time but you were not selected. You start to wonder if it was even worth your time applying for the position! But then, you switch mental gears and get those positive juices flowing.
You choose to remain a member of the organization, and later, start offering free seminars on data analysis (your expertise) to the organization’s members. You also realize that as a busy board member, you may not have had the time to create this seminar, or even the mental space to come up with the idea. There’s no question networking with this group changed your life. You feel extremely valued, the seminars get fantastic reviews and, eventually, lead to a new career path. Confidence spikes way up!
In each case, NOTHING would have happened if no one had initially even tried.
It may feel risky or uncomfortable to apply, but just do it!
Confident people do feel those awkward feelings, but the difference is they don’t let those feelings stop them.
They do it anyway.
If you don’t get it, it’s OK. And it’s OK to feel sad/disappointed/angry about it too!
Here’s the thing: Don’t let those emotions delay you too long. Accept it, and move on.
Then get in a quiet space and ask yourself, what’s the next best move for me?
Go with Confidence!